you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
