Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
