The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
