apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
