Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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