i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
is that a dick in a sweater?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
