it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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