i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
