Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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