NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
