One girl and one boy is just not enough.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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