It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Less talking, more tequila
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
