matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
