What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
