she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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