Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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