evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
he thought i was a dude.
I love having hate sex.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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