Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
