She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
