i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
