It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
