I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Sext me about skeletons
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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