You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
