Whod you bang
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
