Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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