Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
