dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
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