I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize