We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
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