check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize