I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
the gays at disneyland are vicious
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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