Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize