omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize