ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
