dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
