He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
