I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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