What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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