You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
