Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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