So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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