the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
