Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize