Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Screwed.edu
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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