You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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