i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
