I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Naked Twister starts at high noon
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
