oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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