I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
