haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
