Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
