well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
