I think my fart just growled at me.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
